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my brain hurts now

the latest "great idea" from work is mandatory state safety training. so they signed up with a state online company to give us the training and we have to learn about every single bloody thing that is on there. this includes how to handle hazardous chemicals. i don't think we have anything stronger than industrial cleaner....no, wait, i tell a lie, the polish for the bowling lanes is pretty nasty stuff, but it's only handled by a couple of people.
this training brought such gems as:

"electical equipment" i don't know what this one is, other than you have a choice whether or not to use it. i have a feeling, based on context, that it's supposed to be electrical equipment, but who am i to argue with such an obviously fine program.

"infected employees" this was for employees who would be handling such chemicals. to their credit, it does say affected (although i think it should be effected) in the text and the person reading is the one who said infected. but why would you even publish something so stupid?

"managers will assure that documentation is on site" that's good. i feel ever so much better to know that my managers are going to reassure us about paperwork. i always get nervy around paperwork.

those are the first three that come to mind. there are tons more, but i've been too busy being sarcastic at my computer to really remember too much more. but it does rather make me want to run for my favorite high school english teacher and sic her on them. Carole would have a blast.

okay, now that that's done. *sighs* i still have one more test to finish tomorrow. it keeps crashing my browser so i'll try again tomorrow. just what i want to do on one of my days off. *rolls eyes*
work was slow. i read Stephen King and wrote a little more on my current story. have i said before how much i love king's turn of a phrase? today's was "reality can go screw a rolling doughnut." my all time favorite is "plums defy!" lol. no, i don't know what it means.
and i found that Snoopy i was talking about yesterday. i love this one.

and i find it exceptionally true for my writing career right now.


( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 14th, 2012 07:28 am (UTC)
Now, now, if they reassure the paperwork, doesn't that imply that they assured it to begin with? Maybe then meant that the managers will insure the paperwork...you know, just in case it were to meet with an untimely accident or something...involving dangerous chemicals, infected employees and electical equipment!

Oo, sounds like the plot to a zombie story! LOL!

*hugs you a lot*
Mar. 14th, 2012 07:30 am (UTC)
*points at icon* this is me through all the training but fire extinguishers, and even then i had to *facepaw* when they said "know where all fire extinguishers are and be able to identify them."
uhm, they're usually red with a hose, dial and nozzle? lol, that sounds like a bad line-up. "can you identify the extinguisher that mugged you?"
"no, i didn't get a look at his dial, but he wasn't red. and his hose didn't seem right."

okay, i think i need to stop now. it's been a "in a mood" day.

Mar. 14th, 2012 08:12 am (UTC)
Around these here parts there is usually a large red arrow point to them that says, "Fire." Which is rather misleading, but does draw your attention to them...for about the first couple of months, then they fade into the background. Perhaps they should change the color every once in a while to see if anyone notices?

Oo, if he wasn't red and his hose wasn't right, maybe he was a different kind of extinguisher! Like...a candle snuffer! Or, an Earth Extinguisher! (Wind? Water? Heart? Wait, no they frown on that...)
Mar. 14th, 2012 08:43 am (UTC)
yeah, yeah i think i have seen one of those arrows, now that you mention it. and i should know this because we have one right outside our door. my bet is that no one would notice if you changed the colors unless it was to something like neon green with magenta poka-dots, and even then, given the level of drunk for any one of our customers, that's iffy at best.

lol. have i ever commented how much i appreciate your level of insane and how you seem to understand my own?
Mar. 14th, 2012 09:12 am (UTC)
Aw! *hugs you tight* :-)
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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